Saturday, October 29, 2005

Sweet Lauretta Marvin thought she was a woman

You know I was just waiting to use that line from the classic Beetles song on this website, don't you?

While surfing the Internet I actually took the time to look at one of those “Warning: Your Computer May Be Affected With Spyware” advertisements that occasionally crop up while you're surfing the net.. What galls me about these ads is that they usually remove all the spyware from your system that isn't the publishers, thus lulling you into a false sense of security.

Many plays, shows, and stories have revolved around the idea that things are not always as they seem, the most famous in my mind being Shakespeare's Macbeth, but why does the theme remain popular?

Perhaps it's because the easiest deceptions are carried out when we think we're doing something that would be beneficial for us and then there are those always ready to take advantage of the most trusting and the gullible.

A very similar duplicity lies at the heart of gender identity as well, but transgendered people are usually not out to harm or mislead anyone because of it. Outward appearances simply do not always tell the whole truth. We are not simply what our bodies say we are. We are also a mixture of our experiences, upbringing, spirit, and environment all of which shape us to be a certain way.

Unfortunately, for those who suffer through this, somehow our spirit and boy are in conflict and that is why emotional pain becomes a hallmark of our experience. Until somehow we can set this right, we'll wonder through life confused and afraid. Some of us, like myself, trying to fight the feelings and not being wholly honest with herself. (Yes, I can use herself now.) Self-deception has been my enemy all my life and I hope it's not one of yours.

What I have to say will not make much sense, but letting cold hard logic do the reasoning on my gender did not work well for me. Letting the emotions rather than reason guide me on this does somehow. It seems that I let myself be deceived by logic. It's a rather easy thing to do. Sometimes we just have to listen to what our heart tells us, and not our brain. Cutting through deception is sometimes hard, and when we're deceiving ourselves, it's not always easy to know which way to know which way the truth lies.

P.S. I don't know why but my site keeps showing up in searches for the lyrics to the song "Oh Lord, It's Hard to Be Humble" so here they are.

O Lord, it's hard to be humble
When you're perfect in everyway
I can't wait to look in the mirror
I find I get better looking each day

To know me is to love me
I must be one heck of a man
O Lord, it's hard to be humble
But I'm doing the best that I can.

Please note: This is not a lyrics site. I guess I'll have to stop using song lyrics to title some posts.


At Sat Oct 29, 06:20:00 PM 2005 , Blogger Rod said...

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