Sunday, June 14, 2009

Sexual Orientation and Mormonism

I apologize for ignoring this blog, but I have been busy. So much so that I've neglected other blogs. If there's one thing people are still wondering, it's probably what my orientation actually is.

Now, it took me a while to figure this out, but I assumed that gay, straight,and bisexual were the only possibilities in this spectrum. The problem is that I fit into none of these categories. There seemed to be no category for someone who is not interested, even though that one fit me most readily.

I have since learned that this is incorrect.I'm just not attracted to men or women and there is in fact a word for this. Asexuality may seem a strange concept to people who feel that they cannot live without sex, but let's face it, people who really, really want sex will not be spending a lot of time reading blogs anyway.

I have to admit finding out that there are other people who feel this way was something of a relief, although it did not stop me from confronting an editor about it when I tried to bring my own views on the subject of not having a sex drive was not a medical problem to an editor. (Yes, this sentence is awkward, but it's my blog.)

The only problem is that this might doom me to a life of loneliness because it's hard to find someone else who feels that they can get along without sex in a relationship, but at least their our sites out there to help with this problem. (Ace Book is the one that I'm most familiar with.)

And because this is also a Mormon-interest blog, it's important to note that not getting married dooms me at best to the lower levels of the Celestial Kingdom, should I repent of my ways and return to the embrace of the church.


At Mon Jun 15, 07:18:00 AM 2009 , Blogger C. L. Hanson said...

I'd assumed you'd settled on "asexual" from some of the things you've posted elsewhere. As you say, it's rare but not totally unheard-of.

Out of curiosity, when you talk about wanting to be in a relationship, are you thinking in terms of a romantic-yet-asexual relationship or a strongly-committed platonic friendship? In other words, do you sometimes feel romantic "in love" (without the sexual component), or not even that?

p.s. if that's a personal question, don't feel pressured to answer it.

At Wed Jun 17, 11:24:00 PM 2009 , Blogger The Sinister Porpoise said...

I only recall making reference to it once, although sorting things out can be difficult because the assumption is that there's something physically or mentally wrong with experiencing attraction.

It's more like a desire not to live my life alone and finding someone who shares many of my interests and for lack of a better term, a "spiritual" connection.

At Tue Jun 30, 03:58:00 PM 2009 , Blogger Rebecca said...

This is really interesting. I don't know that I've ever met anyone who identifies as asexual (and I don't, despite what I'm about to say), but I TOTALLY get it. All growing up, my deepest desire was not to fall in love and get married, but to just find a really, really awesome friend to spend my life with. I always had these fantasies of me and my best friend living together in a big old house (with a tower!), doing art projects, reading, baking cookies, making dinner together, traveling...And there was never a sexual component to those fantasies. I wanted to be one of the aunts from the movie Practical Magic.

...Suddenly I feel weird about leaving this as my first comment on your blog.

I hope it doesn't sound like I'm trivializing what you feel. That's not my intention.


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